Return of the Jedi has begun and fatigue has set in. Lois has decided to play on PBS Kids and Lana is waiting her turn for it while listening to the movie and looking at the art supplies. Still watching though. Lois fears the Emperor too, so that adds to her trepidation in watching the movie.

By the way, to those interested in my audition yesterday, it went very well. I won’t hear about callbacks or part assignments until this weekend (more people are auditioning on Thursday). It is for a radio-play-style presentation of Robert Heinlein’s Stranger in a Strange Land. It was supposed to be performed at the Chicago Polyamory Convention but it looks like that isn’t getting the registration it needs to go on. The director is seeking options for a change in venue from the rights holders. If that happens, I’ll provide details so people can come see a Geekling Rancher put all of his bedtime story reading to alternate use.

Bib Fortuna keeps triggering my “Who does that look like?” sense. I found this and, well, it’s close:

see more famous faces look-a-likes

Notes from the end of Empire Strikes Back:

Me: “The Ugnaught looks like Principal Strickland from the Back to the Future movies.”

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Lois: “Why is Lando wearing Han’s clothes?”
Lana: “He’s wearing a Han costume!”
Me: “Maybe he didn’t bring any clothes from Bespin and had to rifle through Han’s closet on the Millenium Falcon?”

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Me: “Wow! Cybernetic Hand Replacement Therapy has come a LONG way in 20-odd years. And how does Leia manage to avoid the proud Skywalker family tradition of losing your light-saber hand?”

Does anyone know if Leia loses a hand in the Expanded Universe stories? Like, in some training accident at Luke’s Jedi Academy (coming soon to a strip mall near you!)?

The girls are now vacuuming up three days worth of young-child-watching-film droppings before they get to finish out the series. They also had to pause their Lego Star Wars game mid-level so BatMom and I could go to the eye-doc, so they’re finishing that up too.

Luke: “I don’t think so. I’m looking for a great warrior. ”
Yoda: “Ohhh. Great warrior. ”
[laughs and shakes his head]

Me: “Yeah, we saw how great a warrior he was, didn’t we?”

Lana: “Yeah! He was AWESOME! [light saber sounds]

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BatMom Re: Flying Mynoks: “Watch out! A loose kite! ”

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Me: “How does C-3PO ALWAYS know the odds?”

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“So I used the force
I picked up a box
I lifted some rocks
While I stood on my head
Well, I wont forget what yoda said”

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Lois: “I’m still hungry.”
Me: “You’ve had enough for now. Wait for snack time.”
Lois (sing-song): “Snack time!”
Me: “Later”
Lois (sing-song): “Snack time!”
Me: “Later”
Lois (sing-song): “Snack time!”
Me: “Darth Later”
Lois: “OK”

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Lois (walking around): “Laugh it up, fuzzball!”

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Me: “I want my own Ugnaught”

BatMom and I had to get eye exams today, so we had to start our last two films later than we intended. However, that gave us the opportunity to show them what happens at the eye doctor and to see what BatMom’s retina looks like and the different parts of it (optical disk and macular), as well as discuss the life phases of a fly. Don’t ask. Also, I learned that BatMom totally rocks the Sexy Librarian Look.

We got some Taco Bell for lunch and started watching one of the top 5 sequel films of all time. Some observations:

Lana: “R2-D2 is on top of everything. Threepio just wants everything to be done, but R2-D2 watches everything.”

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Lois: “I see an AT-ST!!!”

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Me: “Like most nonacentarians, Yoda can be quite childlike and juvenile.”

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Lois: “Why did the Emporer say ‘Anakin Skywalker’ when he was talking to Darth Vader (via hologram when the Emperor was telling Vader about Luke)? Darth Vader IS Anakin Skywalker.”

One hour, ten minutes into Episode III, we had to abort. Lois just lost it during the Chancellor/Mace Windu battle. As Windu was absorbing Palpatine’s force lightning into his light saber and Palpatine was mutating (why didn’t this happen with Dooku and Yoda in Episode II?), she buried her head in my chest. I had to stop it after Mace was behanded and defenstrated. Lana broke out in tears in response to Lois’s sadness and worry. It paused on Anakin hanging his head in front of the Chancellor. I then sketched out the important points of the rest of the movie.

We moved on to a New Hope shortly thereafter. I explained movie ratings and how Episode III is a PG-13 movie and that it is ok that they wait some time to see it again. Now they are curled up on the couch in their bathrobes, under their comfort blankets and sharing a bowl of pop-corn and watching a comfort movie as C-3PO hitches a ride with some friendly Jawas. It WAS awful mean of Artoo to trick him into going that way, after all. Poor Threepio.

Lana sees a bronze Astromech droid on Obi-Wan’s ship on Utapau.

Lana “Look a new Astromech droid.”
Lois “What happened to R4-P17?”
Lana “He got destroyed remember?”
Lois “Oh yeah.”
Lana “Daddy? I think R2-D2 is the toughest Astromech droid there is!”

They are also keeping a running light saber count on the Obi-Wan/General Grievous battle. “Oh, he’s lost two, but he’s still got two left.”

“Now he looks like a spider!”
“Oh no! Ben lost his light saber! I hope he won’t miss it!” Yeah, they call him Ben, they’re close.

We had a later start than I wanted for Episode III because my darling daughters let me sleep in late. Then they needed a shower and we had some more technical difficulties.

So Anakin and Obi-Wan are sailing through the lack of atmosphere and the girls noticed that Obi-Wan had a red astromech droid. “That’s R5-P17!” shouts Lois. I never imagined that they would memorize the entire character list of Lego Star Wars!

I’m so proud!

Of course both of them told me how much they loved Jar Jar Binks in yesterday’s films. Oh well, no one’s perfect.

I am a little worried about this movie. They are enjoying all the Artoo-generated humor in the first big setpiece, but it gets much darker from here. It’s their first PG-13 movie and it may be more than they’re ready for. At least they can have some Hope to look forward to (there is another!).

Corrections or comments I received from my children during the films.

“It’s Anger leads to Hate, Hate leads to Suffering, not Hate leads to Anger.”

“That’s not two R2 units. One is black, not blue, so that’s an R5.”

“Why would the Tuscan Raiders be shooting at the pod race?”

Poor Lana was in tears when Anakin had to leave Shmi behind. We had to pause the movie and have a bit of a comfort before we started again.

“I don’t think Count Dooku really wants to get rid of the Sith with Obi-Wan.”

“Is that Daxter’s Diner?” I don’t even KNOW how she knew about that one. As far as I know, it isn’t in Lego Star Wars at all!

All in all, it was everything needed to make a geeky dad bust a few buttons on his shirt.

So we’ve finished Episode II. They were both very excited and Lana is now a deep and abiding Yoda fan. Or should I say Super-Yoda?

Lana on Yoda’s baddassery:

Yoda walks in and forces away Dooku’s force-thrown object: “Yoda looks so tough!”
Yoda grabs his light saber: “This is awesome.”
Yoda fights Dooku: “I don’t even know how to say it, but all I can get out is That is Totally Awesome!!!!!”

Both Lana and Lois listed the Yoda-Dooku battle as their favorite part, followed closely by the wedding of Anakin and Padme.

During the end of the movie, we all shared in a special Valentine’s Day meal, care of Papa John’s.

Lois even took a picture of your favorite Geekling Rancher hard at work keeping the blog updated.

Despite some technical difficulties, we began watching Fox Presents: When Clones Attack at about 3:10.
Lana’s thoughts on Episode I: “I liked it! I loved the pod-racing.”
Lois’ thoughts on Episode I: “I liked it. It’s cool!”

Lois is on the left and Lana is on the right. Your intrepid reporter Geekling Rancher is in the middle. Our light saber precision drill is unmatched by any other family on our block.

All that’s missing here is the pop-corn. We’ll get that at intermission.

Behind me and the girls, you can see the helmets of my Darth Tater and Spud Trooper. On the Coffee Table is the placemat depicting a Venn diagram comparing Uranus and Saturn that Lana made in her Space Cadets after-school program.

BatMom was at work for Episode I and came home about 15 minutes into Ep. II. Family Valentine’s Day, FTW!